Ok, got the lowdown this morning. This is very sad actually, sad but life hey...
"G said he spoke to *ex* on the phone on Saturday and *ex* said he has to start the ball rolling, because he just cant stand her! G also said he was being very nice about you, saying how great it is to see you again and how much he misses you. G then said, he would put all his money on the two of you getting back together!
He also said that Helen told *ex* she loved him and he said he doesn't love her and never will be able to !"
...so, thats pretty decisive. I still dont know what get the ball rolling means, I just replied to ask her that, but anyway, seems he has made his decision then. I cannot understand why he stayed with her for so long (although by his own admission, he hardly sees her).. if he can't stand her and doesnt love her? Perhaps for the s*x, perhaps becuase he was weak, perhaps he didnt want to hurt her, or, just because of work. He was VERY down at the end of February when he saw G for a night out, as he said he wanted to break up with Helen, but had been asked to tender for a contract with her, so couldnt (guess she would have awarded it to someone else if he had dumped her !!).
He told me the site works ended on Thursday, so he just has the report to write, which will take 1-2 months. I dont know if he is still sharing an office with her now the site works are over, of if he is back in his own offices. He will have to liaise with her on the report though, I bet. I said end of May...
Very good news I'm catching up on. Good for you. However, I'll go along w/Jeff here and caution you to not be overanxious and to remember to keep your expectations at nil.
He doesn't seem the type to cut anything off cold turkey, so it may be some time still.
Then, once he is free, you'll also need to make sure things move slowly w/you two so you can protect yourself and not jump back in too quickly. As good as it sounds, remember there is still a lot of work to do on your sitch.
I'm very happy for you and your latest developments. I'll be keeping tabs this week for more.
Hey Rob.. its nice to see you here, old friends hey...
I think things are going to turn out how they are meant sort of regardless of what I do now ! I've done my bit.. its down to him now. I know he WILL break up with her. I think that he WILL want to try again with me. I dont know if we will be a success story though. One thing I also know though.. my intuition said from day 1 we would end up here, I never felt he was gone, it was like there was something not right with the Universe that he had ended it and walked out so abrubtly for no good reason.
But the reason was, he had things to learn and mend in himself and I had things to learn and mend in me, and I sincerely thank him for that. Things in ourselves, not so much to do with our R, or us being together. So I never really felt WE had too many issues in our R that needed to be worked through as such.
Of course, he has created some, by leaving it so long to come back (if he does) and then dating her (I try not to imagine them together, but a little doubt creeps in as to whether I can hold his attention again).
I had to text him today about our tenants, but I forgot to until about 6.30pm. He didnt reply, although it is important, so he must have ignored it. I guess he is with her tonight, getting that ball rolling, whatever the hell that means. I am expecting to hear from him, possibly on Wednesday (big day astrologically) and then, hope to see him Thursday. But yes, maybe he will want a break in between us.
My expectations are WAY above zero! I am expecting him for us to be back together by mid June and making a start at mending this. Which will be exactly 2 years since it started.
Expectations scare the heck out of me! Except when you can control the outcome. Please don't set yourself up for a fall. This guys can't do anything fast....
I know I know.. I cant help it though, I miss him so much, even now, it kills me.
You know what though? The only two good reaons he could come up with when he left me were.. I dont love you and I didnt miss you (when we were S for a week, Sept 07).
And in the past two weeks, I heard .. he DOES love me and he DOES miss me. I knew all along he missed me.. he told me himself several times last year, but this is different, like he really misses me enough to be telling everyone now, and the "I love her" was pretty huge. Sort of vindicated (even if he isnt back!)
But yes, he hasnt yet said he wants back. And then if you look at the 'success stories', some of them are struggling. There are no gaurantees though, I could get back with the Piscean, be fine for a year or two.. and then start to think I had made a terrible mistake. I cant theorise that far, its too hypothetical, I can just go on what I feel now.. I love him and miss him and would be grateful frankly for a 2nd shot at it, and would behave very differently after all the things I learnt here, with the help of my DB friends (patience, kindness, compassion, things are not always as they seem, allowances for peoples faults, learn to appreciate happy moments, laugh more, listen more, be respectful of others, be forgiving)
Hahaha.. that reads funny.. the ONLY two good reasons he could come up with were he doesnt love me and doesnt miss me.. well, what other reasons are there!!?? Lol. They are pretty big reasons.
I just wonder if he meant them then and has since changed his mind, or if he was somehow in a fog, or wanted to just push me away, was angry, I dont know. But whatever, those good reasons got reversed.
I'm not counting my chickens yet, really I'm not, just following that intuition as usual...
He texted me back, saying he is ok, but that is bad news, but that he HAD rented his Dads house out, and that he would tell me about it later (an excuse to phone?) and that he would call me later, *name*...
So.. good he is going to phone tonight! But the "me" on that text over Easter was the only time then and he has reverted to signing his name. So, he may have made the decision to get rid of Helen, but I dont think he has yet made the decision to come back to me, despite BMF G wanting to put money on it happening.
I bought three trombones on ebay and am now trying to buy lab funnels, all in the name of art...
Hi K! Yes, I too used to make jewellery when I was younger.. beads and leather cords, yes.. the problem I found was not in the making, but selling! Outlets are limited, like craft fairs.. but can you find a local shop that will take a few pieces? But as long as you can source beads and stones cheaply, its a great idea!!
I'm cross... my hair is still looking terrible and falling out, but not as much as September. Dont know why its doing it again, maybe the stress of my final degree show?
I had visions today.. I saw my show in its entirety, we have to make 3 pieces (advised).. I can see two cabinets, one representing Uranus-Sun-Venus conjunct and one Venus-Pluto square and then a third large piece, for Saturn-Sun. It looks AMAZING .. in my head, lol! Just got to put it all together now. Exciting !
So, I texted him back and told him that, so hopefully he will ask me about it on the phone later. Wonder if he will invite me to his friends leaving do (being held at bandnight) Thursday night?
I'm going to have to see a picture of the trombone project!
I was thinking.... don't try to connect him breaking things off with Helen with getting back together with you. Of course one has to happen before the other can, but they might not happen one right after the other. (Or at all, of course, but I don't want to be negative Nellie.) There could will be a fair amount of time in between. He may well question himself, and his ability to be in any relationship. Please don't get your hope too high that things will move quickly if they start moving!
