Ok, you need to know that he will not have contact with her. Have him write a "no contact" letter to her stating that he loves you and is working on the marriage with you and that he does not want her contacting him ever again. YOU read it and mail it yourself. Make sure he shows you his cell bill, etc. Total transparency is what you need to rebuild trust. If he wants to really work on the marriage, he will do this. If he is playing you, he won't.
You will be able to handle the withdrawal if you know for certain he is not talking to her.
