It's funny when we think we are ok mentally, but physically our bodies always manage to tell us something different. I tried to run 5k at the gym which takes me about 30 mins, but when I tried to run my legs were like jelly and I only managed to run for 5 mins so my gym session was well and truly pooped. This evening as I type on the computer my chest feels tight so a quick check of my blood pressure tells me I am on 165/95. Don't panic if you are medically minded, I am already on medication, have been for 8 years, but it is todays events which have elevate the blood pressure into the relms of hypertension.
This evening when I got home W was saying nothing so I know she got my txt and I know she knows she's in the wrong. The only thing I said to her was that I wasn't having dinner tonight with her as I was going to the gym, then off to the hospital to see my mum. Well, that gave her the excuse to rant about me not telling her my plans, how she had cooked so much food, and I could have told her this earlier, and how she was never going to cook for me again etc, etc. My response was "I don't know why you are angry at me, I'm not the one who is [censored] around outside this marriage". I know not very DB.
While we are on that point I sent email to Om and told him that I would perform again the surgery that he recently had on his back passage, this time without anaesthetic, if our paths ever cross. I know, I know, this is a big no no but it was how I was feeling at the time. Anyway that will be the only time I elevate his importance here.
So I will now be embarking on a period of darkness with W whilst still maintaining my co parenting duties.
