Yes, I worry about things spiralling out of control too. I`m really really having big thoughts about just getting out of here with the kids. I think H is reaching cracking point and I`m afraid of what he might do.Drink on Friday night probably made him more crazy. And I don`t like the premeditated aspect to it either.
I realise that he`s doing everything he possibly can to annoy me. But its not working.So friday was just him trying a new tack.
Since our split my bedroom as been a haven where I read relax meditate and generally heal through all of this. But honestly I could do that in the guestroom too. His problem is that he has tried to cover up the fact that we`re not sleeping together from the kids. So he`s tip toeing upstairs to my room each morning to make it look like he`s come from there. Is first up and last in bed too si that`s part of the reason he`s tired. Me, I`d be honest with the kids and say everyone needs a little peace and quiet for themselves from time to time and that we`re both just going through a phase where we need space of our own.
I`m going to give him dinner this evening(I`d stopped doing his dinners and laundry since Oct-I have a full time job too and yet it`s me who does the bulk of the housework.)I`m feeding him because he`s not managing to take of himself well and well, hungry dogs just get more savage so maybe it`ll help some of the anger out of him.
My 180 technique is driving him nuts. I don`t think it`s a cheeseless tunnel though because he may just need to go to the brink with himself just to see how crazy his game is.
I left the bed free last night too but no mention of his taking it. No I won`t change the lock.In fact I`m sleeping with the door ajar these nights just so I can tune in to the kids and into him in case he tries something really daft.
And behind it all, I wonder if I`m crazy to be hanging on in here!
