Forgive AND forget?

[WCW]

H had a rare outburst of rage at me in front of friends. He didn't like how I was doing something, grabbed things from me cussing and swearing and stomped around.
I waited a minute, and then told H I had offered and wanted for him to do it and he refused, and now I would accept his apology.
He stormed off muttering something.
I am totally humiliated at how he verbally attacked my ability, in front of friends too.

A little time passed and H was being very soft and drawing me into his conversations with the other people. After they left he asked about the unfinished projects I have in the works with a handyman. I have talked with H about it before, asked his input, got little response.

I wonder if H's verbal attack is his way of setting me back in my place and a release of his feelings of inadequacy. I am moving forward with those unfinished projects that H has left for years. I am trying to get things done as time and money permit, with or without H's help. I'm not letting his physical absence or lack of input prevent progess. There's just so much to do it looks like a cheeseless tunnel!

I am so hurt and angry. I couldn't talk without crying. I sent H an email, and told him that I realize he sets me up to fail and I've allowed it. I told him lot's of things in a short letter. I told him that he's probably right that we will never overcome our issues and challenges when his mind is so set against it. I told him I know he doesn't respect me enough in any aspect to apologize to me but I expect him to apologize to our friends for his outburst.

I don't expect a response. H will ignore until it goes away, that's his way of coping. I don't want to ignore again, and be ignored. H needs to man up.