Maria - your ability to grasp the English idiom never fails to amaze me!!!
OK- I will put this in a particular way:-
You have been "interrogated" by many people, me included, to see if there is anything that you are doing that is 'contributing' to your H's reactions to you...time and time again your responses indicate that is not the case...that indeed you are offering nothing apart from kindness, friendship, understanding and compassion. Indeed, you have offered all of that in bucket loads!!!
Maria, as much as you must want all of this to work out,it must feel as if its becoming all the more unobtainable...
I am never, ever going to be the kind of person who says to you to throw in the towel (give up) but your friends here do understand the point that you have got to.
Your H seems to be incapable of sorting out some priorities for himself and seems to value his work over all other things - despite your efforts - no man needs 2 full time jobs - one is quite sufficient!
I guess you have tried to understand that need - and came up with?
Nothing?
The only thing i can come up with is to be "needed" to be "valued" and an inability to be valued within his other relationships or R...K thats not to say that you don't value you H - obviously you do...its HIS problem with feeling this...I wonder about his value systems - that his esteem is achieved through "doing work for money/esteem" rather than doing "work" for you...
Peculiarly, as I have posted this - that is where I was 3/4/5years ago -placing far greater importance upon my work as my source of validation than I should have...
