Its half five in the morning here and I have just woken up; I am so distressed. I dont really know why I am being hit so hard now. Maybe its that I am losing all hope that he will ever want the M again. We spoke on the phone yesterday about the forthcoming week and access with our D. I wish I was more nonchalant but I hurt so much. He is so detached, so removed, so without love and care. I mentioned that I would like to go away next weekend for the bank holiday and he was fine with minding D. No questions though, was not curious to find out where, with who etc (I am going to a retreat at a buddhist centre.)I want to try and be more detached, I have better days than others. We have our court hearing next Thursday for the Safety Order. I am so upset; I find I dont know myself with all of this; I am not the sort of person that functions in this way. I am trying hard to GAL and not think about OW but it is becoming more clear the nature and seriousness of their relationship. And I am so far away from him, at his insistence.
I am losing hope here, please, I want to be strong but Ijust simply do not understand how after ten years you can blank someone and their life from your existence. There is no mention of me as a person, I am only someone to be tolerated because of our daughter. My health, my ability to cope financially, my career, my hopes and dreams; there is not one drop of interest about anything.
Please, help me I really need some support. I am struggling now. Please respond if you can. I would greatly appreciate it
