Last October I was very sick, sitting in a chair but nonetheless confronting H about his proposed and mysterious week end trip. He couldn`t handle the questions and just jumped up off the sofa, ripped off his jacket and tie and danced around like a boxer threatening me with his fists and asking me if "you want to f***ing fight, c`mon and f***ing fight"
That is not the language of our household nor the behaviour I want my children to witness in their father. Sadly my sons hears(but did not see) this.
He showed no remorse after. In fact continued to blame and berate me. It was the same story the next day. In fact the closest I got to an apology was "I regret I did that" but that was after I took him to court. He went into IC for maybe three or four sessions(he never did clarify that) but has discontinued that.
He was angry at me for taking him to court"I am your husband and I only did it(the physical intimidation) once" "Look how much this is costing me"
To say the man has his head buried in the sand in an understatement. That`s why I say to myself I don`t really want him-at least not as he is now. Yes we have had happier times and yes I do want to try just a little harder to stay married.
I think you may be answering some of your own questions....
Find YOUR balance FG...Learn from your mistakes and don't live in the past.
Everyone here has fallen off the balance beam at one time or another.....Trick is to not make the same mistakes and expect different results.
One of my mantra's has been to....Be the memory that you want your kids to have in the future....You ARE teaching them by YOUR actions....
I'm glad that his violence towards you was only another empty threat.....Although it is unneccesary and SHOULD NOT be something tolerated by you or your children.....That is a dealbreaker in ANY relationship.
