<< I do commend you and think it very honorable and noble that you stuck it out this long. Yup! K, Have you tried the "marriage education" approach with H to get him 'on board' and get you out of this rut you're in? I know it maybe another shot in the dark but probably well worth the shot. There are several convenient and relatively inexpensive ways to do this. For example here's a good bet; I've read a couple of books and papers by this guy and he seems among the best available. I believe your sitch can be saved with some smart moves before it is too late. http://www.gottman.com/marriage/video_workshop/
