These people from your husband's family are not in your family anymore. Try to stop looking at yourself as "not invited" and feeling rejected. I didn't invite you to my dinner party either. You are simply out of the picture. And, it isn't about you, so don't personalize it.
Regarding your EX-in-laws and their family -- you ARE in the way of their Rs with their kids and extended family. Wishing that wasn't the case won't change things. Maybe you all want to live with that fact, but don't avoid it. Your interference in their family would be greatly lessened if you were not living with them. Your MIL feeds on enmeshment, she isn't likely to stop taking responsibility for your emotional/physical/monetary welfare. You can already pretty much tell from her words that she has told someone that they can't move because you need their income.
And, try to give up your secret hope of saving the family home for when XH returns. It isn't going to happen, and if it did, you'd have a much better chance of reconciling on neutral ground rather than the scene of the crime, ongoing betrayals, and so on.
