BUNS, ABS, AND HEART OF STEEL #3

[TRUSTING]

Thanks Cagz, I appreciate it.
I thank God everyday for this wonderful board. I would have surely went insane without it and the extraordinary people on it.

After my meeting with my ex, I began to analyze how he might view me. This is what I came up with.

HE VIEWS ME AS ONE BIG PIECE OF STRESS.

I represent failure. I represent responsibility. I represent expense. I represent confidence that he does not have. I represent broken dreams. I represent the aging process. I represent every woman that has left him, including his dead mother. I represent an education he never chose to get.
I represent his low testosterone level. I represent mortality.
I represent the loving mother he never had.

All of this creates great fear in him.

When you have great fear you can either FIGHT the fear or FLIGHT the fear.

Depressed people always choose FLIGHT because they think this will be the easier road which requires less energy.

What they can't see is that this is actually the harder road which requires more energy.

FLIGHT takes the form of affairs, vacations, spending, self-destruction, abandoning the family, lying, deceit, etc.....

What the Ml'er never looks at is the consequences.

Sin is only fun for a short time, then one has to pay the piper.

The key to this battle is to slowly dissipate the STRESS, and replace it with kindness, comfort, affirmations, unconditional love, peace, safety, security, forgiveness and nurturing.

This of course takes time and effort. Trial and error. Practice and patience. Slowly we have to replace the negative image of us (sometimes real, sometimes imagined) with the positive image.

The Ml'er does not make any effort with this part of the journey. He has no energy to work on the relationship. It is all up to the stander.

Slowly, one piece at a time begins to be replaced. The Ml'er begins to soften his heart and as this occurs the mind begins to clear and becomes more rational.

What is in the heart travels to the mind and comes out as behaviors and actions.