Looking backward but only to move forward SEVEN

[sage]

Well, it's been 2 months since I posted my goals...Easy enough to update them:

1. Diet/exercise to lose weight/get fit

SUCCESS! I've been doing WW since the beginning of the year and not only started the "couch potato to 5K" running program but COMPLETED it and have moved onto the "gateway to 8K" running program. I've lost about 13 lbs, and am up to running 3.6mi. I'm working out 5 days a week. Yay! I feel really good although the last few weeks I haven't lost any weight...I've been slacking a bit so I need to get rejuvenated. I've got about 3-8 lbs left to go so it's time to get re-motivated! A wonderful offshoot? H also started WW and exercising and he's lost about 30lbs!

2. STOP talking

Er...not so good. If DB'ing has taught me one thing (and it's actually taught me many), it's the power of making small changes in my own behavior to encourage changes in h's behavior. It's also taught me how my own crappy behavior can derail even the best of intentions. I am in full on "acting on every bad habit I've essentially ever had relationshipwise" mode which should make it easy to see some improvement.

3. START cleaning

UGH. Not good here, either. Again, I think would speak volumes to h so I need to get to it.

Updated goals:

1. Continue exercising and doing WWs to lose the remaining lbs.

2. Focus on small behavior changes that will have a large impact on relationship with h:
a. LISTEN MORE. SHUT UP. STOP TALKING! This will entail my getting back to my habit of saying about 50% of what I want to say. Especially off limits are comments on h's relationship with DD, negative/sarcastic comments about anything, leading/questioning comments.

b. FOCUS on h when I am with him. Make him, listening to him, relating to him, being with him a priority.

c. STOP scorekeeping. If I need a break, ask for it. STOP making out schedules in my head that show how much I'm doing vs how much he does.

d. Make time for in-house dates (we're doing well with dates outside of the house!). This could have a HUGE impact if I would find some time to make a special meal, suggest watching a show he's interested in, etc.

e. Start meditating again. I KNOW this helps me with anger and cluttered thinking...why aren't I doing it?


3. START CLEANING. 15 minutes a day, no excuses. Just do this. H will LOVE it.

Sage