We will always struggle with what we want to accomplish, but keep trying. If you want something bad enough you will find within yourself the will to do what you need to do. Dont give up and dont beat yourself up because it didnt work the first time. Just keep trying. I want to make a suggestion. I just watched the movie "Fireproof". I learned alot from just watching it and can say that I am going to try an use some of the things that I got form the movie in my own situation. The movie is based on religion, but it is worth seeing. It opened my eyes to things I hadnt thought of and I am greatfull for getting anything new that I can try. In the end I will know that I did everything I could and from the sounds of it, it sound like you want to do the same. I dont know if any of this will help you, but I hope that it will.
