Puppy, You say it right " I'd rather know what I'm dealing with, and act accordingly." If you are in a position when you can act then get all the info and do smth. But most of us are not in such position. Moreover, I think that in most cases best action is to remain positive, cheerful and supportive. Therefore all my action will be a prayer to get a strength and brains. I have to help my wife to get through this- because I she needs my help. And all the specifics that I may get will make me less capable to help her. But this may be just my personality
