ON THE SNOOPING TRY AND JUST THINK IT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE WHAT HE IS DOING......WHO HE IS DOING...HE IS NOT WITH YOU.....AND YOU NEED YOU TO KEEP GOING AND MAKE YOUR WAY....HE JUMPED SHIP FOR NOW.....AND YOU CANT SAVE HIM AND BY WATCHING HIS ROLL IN THE PIG PEN YOU WILL JUST TORTURE YOURSELF......MAYBE SHE KNOW U LOOK AT HER MYSPACE.....
Grace I dont care what HE is doing. I really dont. He is not the same man and I have realized that. If I called him, he would tell me not to look. The old him would be upset and tell her NOT to post that stuff, if it caused me pain. Yea she know I look at her myspace, at least she thinks I do. I have to stop looking. She could write anything about me or my xh on there and I would not even care, but my SON is another story. I dont understand why she does this. I am trying to let it go though.
Until you get it into your head that what she says and what she does is absolutely nothing to do with you, and her MySpace account is none of your freaking business you will never ever get off of this damned rollercoaster ride.
Secondly let me give you a different perspective....Would you prefer your EX-Husband's girlfriend be kind and loving to your Son and treat him like her own or act like a total bitch to him and make him feel unwelcome?
This is about your feelings and the rejection you feel.
You feel as though you have been replaced.
He is your Son, he knows that.
He is also 18, and can make his own choices and his own friends.
Stop paying everyone here lip service.....you are still doing more of the same, still chasing your tail and spinning in circles.
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
I just read your comment over on Silver Fox's thread and....
OH!.........MY!.........GOD!
You must have the male counterpart of my X.
My X also wanted us to use one lawyer (hers of course as she sought the D and contacted one first). She was very angry and I avoided contact as I dreaded the verbal abuse It didn't go away until the financials were over.
I also let her have it too good in the settlement as I believed it would be very ugly and I was still trying to restore our R despite the presence of OM. They became engaged one month after the financials were completed.
One difference is they are the same age but it will be her 3rd marriage and his 2nd. He has no children.
I have often thought I have screwed myself of late and that it's over but I have heard a little voice say, "It's not over" twice now. I know it sounds crazy but I heard this voice only once before, didn't take its advice and should have.
Last edited by sleeper; 04/21/0904:42 PM.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
Sunshine, it is normal to feel rage. Just don't act on it because it gives them a lot of satisfaction to see you in such pain. WAS's and their slimes just l-o-o-o-o-ve to rub your face in it.
And think about this:
If they were soooo happy, why would they feel the need to rub your face in it? Because their new relationship is just not enough for them. They need to add as much drama to it as possible.
So, be mad all you want, just don't act on it or say anything to your son or your friends. Just don't.
WAS's and their slimes remind me of Cuckoos:
The cuckoo migrates northwards in spring to breed. During May the female begins searching for suitable nests in which to lay her eggs. The cuckoo always chooses nests belonging to one species to lay in, probably the same species that reared her. Before laying an egg, she removes one of the host's own eggs from the nest. She may lay up to 12 eggs in this way, each in a separate nest.
Cuckoos can't even build their own nests. They steal them and kick out the eggs. Pretty icky.
They do sound alike. Is your x married yet? Mine is engaged after knowing her for 2 1/2 months. She IS NOT the one he left me for though. A 25 year old was pursueing him and I caught her calling him....he confessed, didnt know what else to do. He decided he like being single again and so he did. He dated another young girl 29-30 after that. He really liked her but she dumped him. Now he has this new one and she is 26. He once told me he didnt date older women, because they were wiser to the game.lol I think he really meant this. I just wish he wanted jump into marriage this soon though. BUT I have got to quit worrying about him. I do pretty good most of the time, but I do have bad days too.
I heard someone say once that a professor said this in class. If a Man/Woman leaves a marriage because they want to be free, then goes out and gets a gf/bf, it is more than like MLC. He said most of the time, the MLCer has to marry the person and live with them for 1 or 2 years before they realize it didnt fix things and same relationship occurs. They then wake up! I dont know how true this is, but it makes sense. My ex said he wanted to be single and play. He also said he wanted different companionship.
