Yeah I read some of your prior threads and I truly appreciate you taking the time to give me advice. I know it must be difficult for you seeing the LBSs here pouring their heart and soul into the M when the WASs are on a tirade destroying the treasured family unit.
The pattern is the same a lot of times... the LBS becomes the WAS, and things continue the cycle... I went through it after my last D. I was the WAS (no A, just D) - and post-D we entered into a relationship for about 9 months and all of a sudden I became the LBS when she chose to leave.
This time I didn't do the pleading/begging/whatever. I was DBing before I knew what to call it. I just knew what didn't work last time.
I'm doing all the right things, pretty much by the book for the most part, although I had a couple of minor backslides. I haven't yelled/begged/pleaded. I've just stated my wishes, my goals, and my desire to make amends for my own mistakes.
It does take two... but I'm going to lose the desire, so that by the time she's left a wreck in her wake, I'm not going to be very pleased with her. Thousands of dollars that has been wasted.
I'm sure things will change after the hearing, one way or the other. Any second chance would be contingent upon a lot of things she's going to have to give up. I'd be willing to give up many of the same things in fairness, but I doubt she'd go along.
My heart is open if she returns with remorse and expresses a true willingness to do whatever it takes in terms or restitution.
Legally? Her attorney has got to be shaking her head:
A borderline mental patient who is having an A with the alcoholic next door, who has no fault that can be proven against the H, and whose name isn't on any joint asset of value, and who initiated the D.
Smart...
"You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into."
