True Love or True Fog? Changing Forums

[Silver Fox]

Thanks everyone for responding,

Flicka - I always enjoy your comments, please don't disappear

Sunshine - I've read some of your posts recently - you know good and well that a 26 year old and a 40 year old don't have a snowball's chance, especially when it's a rebound R so spend your time thinking about something else!

Pearl - you have my permission to smack my H anytime - the ball is in his court again - I'll wait for the next contact he makes and try to stay calm assertive

Trampledheart - I'll catch up with your story soon - I've learned alot from Puppy's advice (the consequences response)- read his posts where ever you can find them

Kimmie Lee - it was a long time coming - I cried everytime I saw H the first year. He even said one time "I give up, it's not worth it, I can't be responsible for ruining your life". I knew then that that was not how I wanted him to come home.

Jack - Thanks for your tough questions - that's one of the reasons I moved over here - I wasn't being challenged.

So, I think anger is the one emotion I've had trouble expressing this whole time. I freely cried and expressed my hurt, surprise, and devastation everytime we got into R talks when the bombs first dropped, but I never yelled or cursed or threw things. I'm a pretty calm, laid back, patient person. The most angry response H got from me was over the phone after I received his filing - I called him with "Thanks a lot, great timing a week before our 20th annniversary and be sure you tell your girlfriend I will indeed be contesting". Gee, looking at it in print it doesn't sound very angry, but I was yelling and he's not used to that!

And yes, I do want to be married to him. I try to focus on who he really is, the one I've known since he was 22.
But as others have said, right now he's not the man I married and if that man doesn't return I'll have to let him go.