Mulesqb - A Day in Court

[mulesqb]

Hey guys - I just want to thank all of you for all the kind words. My STBXW moved out on March 15th. We went to court on the 19th. Since then things have been improving dramatically. All of them have improved their grades which is huge as it was a big concern. They look happier and we have set in to a very nice routine at home.

We went on a great vacation where we met up with Coach and his wife (I saw that Coach started a thread so I will post more about that over there.)The boys were telling me on the way home in the car that it was the best vacation of their lives. I really felt like we were finally turning the corner. Until....

My STBXW moved into the neighbor's house over the weekend. Needless to say it's been pretty traumatic for me and the boys. And for a fleeting moment on Saturday night I lost Strength and Honor. I was walking my dog at 10:30pm up my driveway and looked up at the neighbor's house (it is next door) to see her hanging curtains in his house. The boys had walked out with me they saw it too. As I was standing there the neighbor and one of his friends opened the door and walked out and were laughing in our direction. That's when I lost it for a moment. I didn't curse or anything like that - just told them that they were all garbage and deserve each other. Also told him if he was such a tough guy to come over to my house man to man. Then I took the boys inside. I'm very upset at myself for stooping to their level. But I can't take it back now. I think it also scared the boys. It was just not an easy way to find out about this. Obviously I'm the only one that cares about the boys right now.

So yesterday was a very tough day. The boys are not taking it well. The whole day was about her drama and they are now watching everything going on out in the street. It sux, it really does - just when they were really starting to look happy again. This woman is sick. As I told Coach - at least now I have my closure. I don't want her back - won't ever want her back, and I'm not really sure she should be around the kids much. But that is for a courtroom, unfortunately.

FIB - Thanks so much - we are brothers!!! I will give you a call. It was tough weekend to find time with all this crap going on. Time for myself is on hold for a while and I'm fine with that. As you said - I am very lucky to have the boys and will cherish every moment. This is an important time for them. The time for me will come, I know that now.

M from Tenn - thanks - you are so right. I'm good there. I've been following your posts in the alt uni - your family is always in my prayers.

Lost - Great to hear from you. I had stopped posting for a while because I felt I was past the DBing point and when I came back here, I got depressed about my sitch.

Thx for the words - I do have the boys in C. It was going well until the latest events. I called the therapist yesterday and she was stunned at the behavior. She said that she didn't see this one coming ad can't imagine a parent being that cruel. The next session should interesting. I don't attend any more at the therapist's requests. She said all of the boys' issues are with the STBX.

You bring up a very interesting theory. I think there is a lot to what you say. It definitely is accurate in my sitch. But I do think something has occurred in her though. Her whole demeanor, look, attitude and personality has done the ultimate 180. I have to think something more has gone on to start this process and then the part about justifying and redefining kicked in.

Strength and Honor.