Learning to Detach

[trampledheart]

Hi kjensen,

I understand how angry and hurt you are at the change in your H... Who'd ever believe that a wonderful, loving father could distance himself from his girls! I couldn't believe it either when my H did the same thing.

But apparently, that's something that many MLCers go through. They aren't capable of thinking about how it all affects their family.

I don't understand it myself, and I often was so appalled at my H's behavior as a father, that I argued and pointed out his wrong-doings, to no avail. I think that it only made him feel as if I was b---h, being so judgmental. So please don't make the mistake I made. Just leave him alone and do your own things with your daughter. I read somewhere that his distancing is part of the MLC process where the MLCer becomes the "opposite" of who he was.

I think the best thing to do is just go on and make plans without him and concentrate on your children and yourself. I think in your case, your H will definitely come around. He is going to C and that should help speed up the process. If you GAL and concentrate on your children, your H will make his way back to you and the girls sooner than later.

Take care!