thanks for the sound advice, i was truly in the dumps today trying so hard to stick to my guns and have NC and then..........? Guess who called??????? You r absolutely right, she did i have to admit i was totally nervous like a little school girl on prom night, but i think i did ok i made a few mistakes but for the first contact i think i did ok.
She called to talk her voice was a bit apprehensive at first but she called and asked if i wanted to talk i replyed i did. So we began talking and she said that she wanted to come home(chicago) this weekend and get some of her stuff her school books and some of her other knick nacks that remind her of home(she is in Ohio) and i choked it back and said to her that that was a good idea and asked if she would feel more comfortable if i were not here and she replied that no she wanted me to be there.
So one of the mistakes i definately made was i stayed on the phone way to long we talked for close to 3.5hrs, i know the book says to not carry on long conversations, but i could not control myself, to finally hear her voice and her laugh was a incredible feeling. She was telling me all about her sisters trip to vegas, how she went out with friends and stuff like that, I told her about working out, how i had actually been cleaning and keeping the house clean. She asked if i had been fishing i kinda chukled and replied as much as possible she laughed and we just kept on talking.
I at no point in the conversation broke down or pursued her we talked as friends. She was pretty inquisitive about the counseling I am recieving and what are we working on, that type of thing at one point listing off some of the things that were problems lack of communication,anger(on both of our parts),not cleaning...etc.
I wasnt sure how to handle it but i figured a good 180 would be to offer to bring the dogs to see her and bring the stuff that she wanted this weekend since I will be off for the 7 days. I told her that I understand how she feels about the seperation and that this was her show that if she wants to be friends that is what i want to, I also told her that she knows how i feel and that I dont need to tell her that stuff that if she feels this will make her happy to be seperated that i was totally ok with it that i was taking this time to work on me. We have been best friends for 13yrs. so if she truly does not love me and we r over I want to maintain our great friendship it is very important to me.
She is supposed to text on tuesday to let me know if she is coming up hear this weekend or if she wants me to drive to ohio, which would not be bad anyway because i could see my family and stuff.
I am happy right now just because i have missed her laugh so much, but i am not putting much stock in it she told me point blank that she did not want to get back together she wanted to be friends and so do i that is better than nothing. She told me that she has not been bad mouthing me and that she has just been telling people that I make a great best friend, but a great partner not so much.
So lay it on me im open for all criticism and advice....please I truly love this woman.
