Craig is right. I learned what little I do know the hard way and with much trial and error and forced humility. That picture was just a joke. I wasn't talking about DBing. The guys just teased that I was because of how the picture looked. We were actually in the middle of a joke when it was snapped.
No I don't believe a person just wakes up one day wanting something new. I think it comes into their thoughts slowly and deceptively.
Your husband, in my opinion, is shallow and deceived into thinking his life will be better if he just switches rides, so to speak. The problem with that is unless you clean yourself and your own garbage up (which he is not doing), you're just gonna screw up the new ride too.
That's what you need to make sure YOU DON'T do.
That's why you need to take care of yourself mentally and emotionally before you jump into a new relationship.
New wears off at different stages.
But one thing you can bet on is reality WILL ALWAYS come knockin.
When that is true with every fiber of your being, you will begin to live and there will be no more obsessing over the small stuff. Many times I thought I was there but it was a long time before I actually was. When I got there, the world lifted off my shoulders. Just keeping praying. And don't forget to pray for wisdom for yourself.
When that is true with every fiber of your being, you will begin to live and there will be no more obsessing over the small stuff. Many times I thought I was there but it was a long time before I actually was. When I got there, the world lifted off my shoulders. Just keeping praying. And don't forget to pray for wisdom for yourself.
Amy me too! I thought soooo many times early on that I was giving GOD the control, but I wasnt. Just like now, I think I am doing ok. I know I can do better though. Next month I will probably look back and say that I wasnt doing good at all. I am just starting to realize that you ALL (people here) can see things I cant right now. That is what I have got to realize and remember when you give me advice. I must say, your words can be HARSH, but you know, youve been there. I just want him to realize what he has done and is doing. He is rushing, why? I dont know. But, I wish he would slow down. Do you think it is ok to just go on a date? Or do you think that is a bit much for me right now?
When that is true with every fiber of your being, you will begin to live and there will be no more obsessing over the small stuff. Many times I thought I was there but it was a long time before I actually was. When I got there, the world lifted off my shoulders. Just keeping praying. And don't forget to pray for wisdom for yourself.
Amy me too! I thought soooo many times early on that I was giving GOD the control, but I wasnt. Just like now, I think I am doing ok. I know I can do better though. Next month I will probably look back and say that I wasnt doing good at all. I am just starting to realize that you ALL (people here) can see things I cant right now. That is what I have got to realize and remember when you give me advice. I must say, your words can be HARSH, but you know, youve been there. I just want him to realize what he has done and is doing. He is rushing, why? I dont know. But, I wish he would slow down. Do you think it is ok to just go on a date? Or do you think that is a bit much for me right now?
Renee, I think you need to do things, but if you go on a date, I think you are very vulnerable right now and you could end up doing something you might regret.
Renee, I don't think it is wrong to go on a date if you want to. After all, you're not going to marry the guy, it's just a date. It could be a great distraction. Just as we are encouraged to get out there with our friends and GAL, even though we may not feel like it. Fake it till you make it and all that.
I think the problem with dating so new into this is b/c it is a distraction and we are vunerable we may get pulled into something not right for us we may want to show ourselves and XH we are still attractive
but it wont work b/c chances are we will not so the work inside that is so needed ( just like whhat our xh did) time for dating will come later work on yourself you may not be able to make a good choice in a R now peace
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
so peace you agress that my xh has jumped in to soon? I dated my xh for 6 months and we married and it lasted 20 years! How does this differ if it does? Also, my xh had just lost his father 5 or 6 months prior to meeting me. His family sort of fell apart after that. I guess what I am trying to say is how come we lasted 20 years if its wrong to jump into a relationship so soon?
Of course I'm a wonderful person....LOL....but would you tell my H that...Nah....he knows it but can't admit it....
Actually he talks about divorce all the time.."for closure for the kids"...no it's for him...I am not helping him though...I keep waiting for the papers to come...In time I know he'll file...for now I'm just surviving day by day...hour by hour sometimes...I am so much better though...if you go back and read some of my threads you would see. I was a basket case....
I know you are only reading part of my story but you know that my H has an almost 10 year old son from an affair he had all those years ago...I did not know he was nor did I know about the kid....I found out a year ago...the boys birthday is the day before mine...my kids are devastated, and my H doesnt understand why...it was a mistake he said, she was on birth control...I guarantee she wasnt, I know her...she trapped him thinking he would leave me for her and now he has someone else...he's running from something, I just don't know what...he was in a deep depression about 24 years ago...family history of it...his sister is my best friend and my mom and his mom are best friends...so how do I get up every morning and not think about him in some way...well, I'm working on it but it is truly hard....
I would love to get to know you also....I don't have a my space yet but everyone keeps wanting me to get one so I'll have to figure it out....Vitually Handsome knows how to get a hold of me... He can direct you...I'm sure he will read and see...
I am in the heart of Ohio....cold, warm, cold, warm....we are not far from each other at all....
there's so much I could tell you so go to my thread and read...it's ugly....but getting better....
Treese
Treese
H 49 M 45 D 23, D17, S12 M 25 T 31 01/07 OW H at my door w/proof Bomb ILYBINILWY 06/07 Sep 01/08 headed for the greener grass, Mar08.B#2H has child who is 9 11/08 pos.paternity