Okay, so I couldn't settle in to work until I got this draft done. Haven't sent it yet of course!


Dear CJ

I’m very sorry for your send off this morning. When Doug called last night I was thrilled that you were getting out of the house to do something fun on your own for the first time this summer.

I’ll admit that I was also happy for the opportunity to have the house to myself for a day. Something that I have not had in a very long time. I envisioned working, making some phone calls and doing a full work out (kidney willing).

I think we need to sit down and perhaps draw up a game plan for how to handle our schedules and expectations for this school year.

I was a bit surprised by how exhausted I was after yesterday’s classes. I am also quite anxious about the state of my kidney health. The low fever remains, the pain is persisting today, although low grade. My appointment is next week. I am NOT thinking the worst, but there are some less than great possible outcomes here.

So all of this has been feeding my rather down mood of late, not to mention this never-ending headache. FYI I am in need of a neck rub 24 hours a day, so any time you care to offer would be great.

About your school work. Yes, you are spending more time on that than either of us anticipated at first. I am PROUD of how well you are doing, and very happy that you are finding it so valuable.

YES, you are doing other stuff…cleaning, mowing, cooking…and I DO appreciate it.

What bothers me I suppose, are some of the bigger things that continue to slide. I can’t quite grasp how, when you know it bothers me to no end, you have made no move to conclude the income tax fiasco of 2000. I KNOW you said you didn’t feel it was urgent, but it is something that bothers me a great deal. Do you have the income tax info for 2002? Why is this something you keep promising to do and then not do it??

When I did laundry on Sunday I noticed large patches of mould on the towel in front of the washer. You mentioned what the problem could be and that you’d look at it.

Why do we have so many empty beer cases when we live one minute away from the beer store? Can’t some of the empty wine bottles go out with the recycling?

And I know that you’re not as good as I am at judging how long dinner preps take, but when you made the calzones, do you remember asking if 7:30 was a good time to eat?
I said yes. It was 5:00 then, but you kept working until nearly 7:00. We ate at nearly 10:00 and I was too ill by that time to enjoy it.

I suppose what I should have done is just made myself dinner? I kept offering to help so as to get it ready sooner, but I guess you wanted to do the whole thing for me. Which is sweet, but the timing really sucked!

I think I’m kind of rambling now, so I’ll try to sum up what I intended by this missive. I think we should sit down and discuss how we can BOTH make the upcoming months productive, peaceful, and fulfilling.

Love Susan

P.S. And yes, I caught the sarcastic edge to my comment about your e-mail about cutting back significantly on your school work…I’m sorry.

That is, however, another example of something you “promise” that you don’t follow through on. I don’t WANT you to sacrifice your grades or learning experience, I just feel that there must be a little middle ground we can reach somehow.