Well Nathan's counselor today said in his sessions it is becoming a recurring theme of war (they do play therapy with toys, he always chooses the sandbox thing), and then he buries the people. She said more but it boiled down to her opinion that he is showing the conflict he sees with me and H and when he buries them it is his way of trying to 'bury' our conflict. She says ultimately it will be better for him to be able to 'bury' it one way or another, either with a D or a reconciliation.
But she said not to make a decision because of that, that if we are truly still undecided then we should take our time making a decision and Nathan will have to wait it out...
She also asked if Dan or I were interested in what she said about MC...I told her I was but he was not. He thinks MC doesn't work b/c we tried it 2x and it didn't work. However he conveniently ignores the fact that he was actively involved in PAs during BOTH counseling attempts. Hello, counseling cannot work to heal the marriage if you are still pursuing someone else.
Today I am very calm, disappointed, but calm. I really want to pull the plug on this marriage today just so we can have a decision and go with it.
H had the nerve to tell me last night I was living in a fantasy land. It was in a weird context but I would imagine he probably includes my thoughts that we would end up back together. He said he wanted to this whole time but the actions do NOT line up...So I am out of that fantasy now.
