WAW1

[markhaving probs]

I had a call from my wife this morning saying she had been sent the divorce papers from the court I had signed sent to her. She complained I answered one question that asked if I was contesting the divorce which I answered 'no' to. The question asks for a reason why the respondent (me) does not wish to pay towards costs. I answered by saying 'I do not want the divorce'. She took that as me attempting to halt proceedings and she went on to say "that would suit you, a 5 year seperation". She then went on say what a stupid thing to write blah, blah, blah. In the past I would have blown my top and had a row about it, particularly as she was being nasty. I calmly told her not to worry about something that had not even happened. What do you make of it?

Also, I read on a sitch where JCJ says women lose respect for H's when they do not stand up for themselves, like it is some sort of test. I am confused as my new behaviour towards my wife is a 180 so I need to know when to stand my ground and when to let it go. I want to reconcile but being seperated, not much communication - only negative stuff is making this very hard.

I am also considering something Portland Dad said about bills ets. I currently pay the mortgage, all households bills etc, while my W pays her share of the visa bill and stuff for the children. I currently do not pay maintenance but Portland said a WAS should pay bills etc before the D goes through to show her what it is going to be like. What should she pay considering she would not have enough money for the mortgage, should she pay the standard gas, electric, phone etc? I am moving back to the house in 11 weeks when she moves out to go to her mothers house. After that we split for good. What should I do?