If you are committed to xBF, then you need to be ok w/waiting for him. Remember, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers knew it well when they sang "the waiting is the hardest part." They knew what they were talking about.
It is about patience and while both men have their needs in a completely different way, you are in a place where thinking about the waiting will drive you crazy. Impatience is a very bad thing.
I know from experience that being impatient can consume a person. I've been fighting it myself for the past two years now. I wanted immediate positive steps from my XW, I wanted to see immediate changes in me w/my C, I wanted immediate results from the divorce process, and I wanted to know if I was on or off the "A-list" immediately when I first started dating again.
All of it comes across as being needy as well. But, think about it - WE ARE NEEDY! We've been left behind and forced to find out the answer to WTF? It creates lonliness, doubt, and a NEED to be wanted and valued again.
That doesn't make it right or healthy, but it is true for us all.
I heard a quote today that I really liked:
Quote:
"Don't ask for things to get easier. Ask for you to get better."
I really like it and I think we all can relate to it as we all want things to get easier for each and every one of us. The truth is, it won't get easier for any of us. No, instead the road is much bumpier than we'd like to admit.
Therefore, I think we'd be on to something if we turned our focus away from things getting easier and instead continued to focus on our own improvement.
DBing is supposed to be about making a better you, but I know I've personally forgotten that aspect many, many times before. I need to be better at focusing on "getting better" b/c I know things won't be getting any easier for me any time soon.
Just my opinion, so take what works and chuck out the rest, Princess!
