So Amyc according to what I wrote, in your opinion, were we pretty messed up? I learned to live with it. Dont get me wrong, we had good times. BUT when he got mad, for the past few years, he would threaten me with divorce. I told him one day I would get tired of this....he beat me to it. Is it possible he was starting MLC as far back as 2003 or 4? I dont know. I do know that the girl he is marrying is an emotional mess. She would have to be. Losing a child is not something you take lightly, even though she does a good job covering it up. Her mom is the one that left the baby in the car, so she gives her daughter anything she wants, therefore my xh gets to enjoy it too. We struggled with money and I am sure he is liking it. I could be wrong. Who knows. I would however NOT trade places with him. I may be struggling, but I have GOD, and I am learning to be strong again.
You weren't anymore messed up than some of the rest of us so don't go giving yourself the crown .
It doesn't matter if he's in MLC or when it might have started. All that matters is you are learning and growing and he is not because he chooses to cut and run and keep making foolish choices.
He is a small-minded jerk who left you to your own devices to either sink or swim.
My xh is sooooo ridiculus (I know I spelled that wrong). He came to pick up my son for dinner and would NOT even pull in the driveway! How stupid! He, insteaad, turned around up the road and pulled in front of my drive and made my son walk to the road. It isnt that far, but its just the point of it. Like he is going to catch something if he pulled in the driveway. Of course, she was driving and they were in her vehicle. I peeked out the window. NO they couldnt see me. Why does he have to be like this? What good comes from this? When I dropped off son, the one time, I pulled right in his driveway, let son out, and went on about my business. This is crazy. This man acts like I have a disease. WHY? I dont want to fight anymore....dont he understand that, I just want to be civil for my son. This is why I am leaving him alone, that and the fact that I dont want anything to do with him and have better things to do for ME.
Jack I would NEVER expect him to come to the door. But making my son walk to the road is crazy. He doesnt pull in the driveway because of me, I know this, he always pulled in before. I dont think I am obsessive, I just dont get him. It's just the little mean things he does. I didnt even open the door. I could have been standing in the door, but I didnt want to. No need to. But making my son walk all the way to the end of the driveway, when all he had to do was pull up and let him get in, is crazy. Do you not think that is childish?
Why do you say your XH is so ridiculous when it was her that was driving? She wants nothing to do with you and rightfully so. She is trying to keep her distance.
Why did you peek out the window in the first place? This is still stalking behavior.
I peeked out the window to see if they were in my xh's truck. It has been in the shop and supposdly is costing alot to fix. Just wondering I guess. I think she was driving, I didnt stare, just looked out the window. Would you not have looked? Just curious. Is this really stalking? Cmon Kerry, I was just curious about the truck, nosey I guess. Well maybe she is. She doesnt like me, she thinks I am a crazy xw. I dont want her to hate me. I really dont. I would like to be civil to both of them. Especially if he is going to marry her. Thats just me though, I cant stand the thoughts of someone disliking me, even her. I know I am crazy, but I have always been this way. I guess thats why it bothers me.
What I am feeling now is this....and its just a feeling. I want to call and leave him a message and say to them both, that they dont have to avoid me, that I am in no way wanting to cause trouble. Those days are past. But I know that would not be good for me to do that, right?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
THIS is the reason posters are using the word "obsessed."
I think if you are totally honest with yourself, you will admit that calling him to tell him that he doesn't have to avoid you is just an excuse to gain contact again.
If you truly do not want to cause them trouble, then leave them alone! In time he will come to understand that you are "safe." But that is not going to happen if you can't leave this alone.
Look, we are not unsympathetic to the way you feel. If all of this sounds harsh it is just that it is imperative that you get on board with going dark here. I understand, I really do. It was (and continues to be when I need to use it again) hard for me.
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