Sorry about the MC cancellation and that apparently xBF is a bad role model! As much as she says she wants to go, her actions are speaking louder than her words. Honestly, we didn't get anything out of counseling the couple times we went because xBF didn't want to be there. Now he says he really wants to go because he knows he/we need it but still no appointment made. Actions.
If this is a long standing pattern with her, you need to decide if it is something you are willing to live with or not. As Amy pointed out, will it make you feel like a parent to her or is it just one of her quirks that you can just work around? Because at this point I'm not sure she's going to change.
Try not to guess at her motives for going/not going. That will put you right back on the roller coaster.
If you love somebody, set them free. http://tinyurl.com/2empx2g
