My brother is going through something kind of similar and he was able to benefit greatly by settling this out of court and using the same lawyer. His soon to be ex waived his retirement which she was enititled to half for the rest of her life when he retired. That is something he has busted his butt for and went through severe hardships for like being shot at during war. Also his wife excepted only child support. Turns out she may have had a conscience about running around on him in the end. Although the courts don't care about adultery where they live at all. So it's not something he could have used. Most courts don't care about it from what I have heard. But she herself was decent in the end. Maybe that will be the case with your wife. I hope so. You sound like a great husband and father. You should walk away with your head held very proud.
