Starting a new thread, the old one was pretty full anyway!
Not sure what is up but re-reading the post on K's thread about unconditional love reminded me of everything I have heard/read the past 18 months regarding boundaries, loving does not equal doormat, etc etc.
So I have been seeing things differently for the past couple days. Able to detach more, I suppose, I don't know what else to call it.
Last night I worked the HS Girls' track meet, it was so much fun! Five hours long but lots of fun. Course it didn't hurt that the super-cute chiropractor in town was timing with me...
There were six of us standing there together timing and a few were smart-a$$es like me. So I was making little sarcastic comments, teasing them and they were teasing each other. Made them laugh a lot of times. That is who I always was at parties and hanging out with friends back in college and at work. I was the one who made the witty observations and made people laugh. So it was nice to feel like ME again. I work another meet on April 30 and I can't wait!
Most of the people I was working with were guys, and married guys. Between races they would be texting/calling their wives or talking to them if they were at the meet. I thought to myself, "See, you can have a real husband who talks to you and spends time with you, and who you can curl up with at the end of the day." I used to have that and I WILL have it again. Wonder who the lucky guy will be?
Anyway I kind of feel like the blinders are off and I can see things as they are, not as I wish for them to be.
I got home at 10:15 and Dan was asleep in the kids' room. I went in and tapped his foot to wake him up. He stirred but didn't get up. I came in at 10:45 to put away laundry in the kids' dresser. Thumped him again (he needed to go home!) and then left.
Decided oh well not my problem so I went to bed. That is the first time I have ever just gone to bed and left him be. I don't pester him but I have always been 'available' out in the living room when I get home and he has had the kids. I know I was doing it just in case he had some urge to talk, but I am not going to hang around for that anymore.
So anyway I went to bed. I texted him before bed (how weird since he was in my house!) and just told him I would take the kids this weekend and he could have them next weekend (since we hadn't done a schedule). Said he could come to karate Sunday night if he wanted but otherwise I had the weekend handled...
