My Story -- Advice for a Left Behind Spouse

[PortlandDad]

What do I do about money?

If this is your Ws decision to D, then let her deal with it. This is what loving detachment means. She is a big girl, she will figure it out.

What do I do if she asks? What if she asks why I seem so distant? It seems obvious but I don't know how to handle it.

Just say that you are evaluating and dealing with the situation and leave it at that. Your actions will speak much louder than any words that you can say to her right now. Start GAL, doing 180s and acting "as if" things are all right.

What should I do if she does it again? Do I engage and say "you look upset? Do you want to talk about it?" Or do I just ignore it? What is the protocol?

Do not initiate talks about the R. Act nonchalant when she is around. If she starts a talk abut the R, don't goad her or prod her to talk, just listen to her and look her in the eyes when she does talk. For your part, you have to put emotion aside and just LISTEN.