I at the public library while s4 plays, so didn't have time to give your post a proper read, but one thing jumped out at me was the bathroom cabinet and your response, the one you didn't say. Something on Nikanight's thread was where her DB coach said about making the home a safe haven for H. I think that if we would say things such as, well you try dealing with it.... that would definitely put them on the defensive and make things much more difficult. I know you didn't say it, but I just wanted to point that out as I think you will have an abundence of opportunities to say it in the next few weeks, but in the interest of the M, must not say it. That isn't to say that it is not much deserved! Too bad we can't say the things that would feel so good, but the benefit would be short lived. I tell myself that as I let some digs drop and I'm biting my tongue (literally).
Thank you for the emails, I did get some and they do help.
