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[StrgMarvelousWmn]

I have done a pretty good job of not getting too sucked in by the nuances of DH's emails over the past few months. However, I received one today that just struck me as odd. we have been emailing back and forth about much of nothing--Easter, our niece's wedding, what will happen as far as DH's job when the ship returns. Like I said, much about nothing. But, as i said earlier, something about this email dtruck a chord in me.

I had asked him,in the email prior to this, if there was anything in particular that he wanted to eat when he got home.


This is his response:

SMW,

I have no preference for food right now. I haven’t had much of an appetite in the past week or so. I’ll just be glad to get off of this thing. I’ll be busier than usual tomorrow because of the Tigers. I bought 5 game cards for bingo last night but didn’t win anything. We only had one person from AIMD that got anything from the raffle also. Kind of makes you wonder. The Reactor Dept. got most of the winnings??? I remember being happier than this on the Truman but this place saps it out of you somehow. I just don’t know how they do it, but once I figure it out…….Talk to you guys later. Take care.

DH

Interesting that he has so little appetite with the ship approaching home day by day. No appetite for a week or so also relates to our last phone conversation. The whole conversation revolved around what he was doing, what the kids were up to, and what he had bought for them in England. that was the first thing that struck me.

The second was his comment about being happier on the Truman. That was DH's duty assignment from Dec.2001 to Dec. 2004. During the deployment he made on that ship, I was pregnant with and gave birth to D5. We were disgustingly happy all during that time. We spent a lot of free time together, went out together a lot, and were the couple everyone else envied. It was also when DH wrote me the email I found that clued me into knowing what his LL is. We attended church every week, were both active in choir, and involved with the Children's Church. If this new life is what he wants, why would he have been happier at a time when he did not know OW, when we were very much in love, when things were so different then they are from what he is pursuing now???

Now, I an nervous about going to the pier. I have prayed about this and I am not worried, just anxious. Does that make sense?

Living God's blessings with grace and dignity~
SMW