I think it is great that H is acting like nothing is wrong. I think it is his coping mechanism and also his greatest desire. Like when kids lie, because that is what they truly wish was the truth. They really wish they had not broken the vase, so make that their statement. It is their wish for how things should be or could be. H isn't ready to disect or analyze things, eh jsut wishes it was normal. That is my take, at least.
Also, seems like expectations are creeping in and taking hold. You have the expectation that he will logically use his time to spend all he has with you and the kids. He thought of something that needed to be done and did it, without thinkinng of it from the angle you did. If you don't voice what you expect from him, he won't know. Not that I know if it is good to tell him all this, jsut trying to present a different perspective.
I agree with just telling him you are out of sorts at the moment, but would prefer to discuss it later, if that is okay. Something that nicely postpones the discussion. Good idea.
I'm glad things are going well. Enjoy, you earned it and you have done a GREAT job with the kids and house!!!!!
