Hi BND, I am sorry to hear that you are frustrated but I understand you so well. I can imagine how working for others and not getting the credit for it can be frustrating.
I am amazed that your MIL is not willing to repay the loan at this time. You might be able to have a business on your own with that kind of starting capital. I hope she will find a way to repay you soon.
I hope for you that you will be able to work something out. Have a lovely rest of the week. (((HUGS)))
Phfft... You're tone. You can kick box Your bust is bigger You have some amazing kids.
A question for you, if a mediocre life was the price to pay for healthy children, would you pay it? Just curious. And in no way am I saying your life is so-so. Don't take for granted what you have. : )
That being said pass the party favors...Eyore.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
First off, I am glad you applied for the new job. Maybe they'll call, maybe not- maybe you'll want it, maybe you won't. The point is, you opened up a bunch of new options, and that is important.
Back to your earlier post...
Thank you for being human!!! I sometimes wonder if I can truly forgive and forget. Sometimes it seems to come so easily to people here, and I feel as if there is something wrong with me. I do understand that you did so like a pro, but thank you for putting your feelings out there like you did. You didn't sound whiny at all. You have valid concerns and worries. Yes, you will find a way to overcome them- it just seems that you have that ability. Thanks for not sugarcoating this, though. I really appreciate your honesty.
The forgiveness did not come easily, it is a daily excercise, kinda like mental gymnastics.
I struggled for so long in this area because I just could not wrap my little brain around the idea of actually letting all of the MLC crap go and forgiving him.
He created such a mess and there was so much destruction, and slowly but surely we are rebuilding, but it has been awfully hard.
I am going to start a new thread in a couple of weeks, as it will be two whole years since my Husband has been home.
What a freaking long journey it has been.
From my FIL's death in 2002 to now.
I understand why you don't trust your Husband anymore, but I also see through your words on your thread.
You love this Man, you have a history with this Man, you have nothing to lose.
Don't be afraid, just let down your guard a little and let him see the "real" you.
Believe it or not you are in total control of the situation. The worst has already happened, You are Divorced. There is no othr place to go but up.
((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))
There can be no testimony without a test. I am praying to go through this test and come out the other end with a new and better marriage then before.
Whoo hooo BND! Best of luck with the job. Hope you get it if that's what you decide you want. I think everything hasppens for a reason. Sending you positive vibes.
BND I'm just catching up on other people's threads. I always seem to catch them when they are in danger of locking!
I know exactly how you feel about your job and having to get it right to maintain some sort of financial stability. I've been there etc.
In about October last year I was beginning to think that the right job at the right pay etc would never come my way. I felt pretty hopeless as like you I was doing more than was expected of me in the job I was in at the time. They never said thank you. I stayed with them for nearly 8 years through thick and thin and yet loyalty is not something the NHS rewards (unfortunately). So by the time I left I felt no pangs of guilt, they didn't deserve it. It was time to do things for me (and mine).
The job I am in now is much further away from home. This is still a concern for me given all the D13 is going through at the moment but it was a trade off between staying where I was and not being able to provide adequately for my family and working longer hours (mainly due to travelling time). I also knew that once I got the higher grading it would eventually be easier to get a similar job nearer to home. I now enjoy my job again whereas before I was beginning to resent it. I've got enough battles in my personal life I couldn't handle them at work too. I also feel I am getting recognised for my contribution and not just in monetary terms. This is really important to me. I don't remember of by heart which LL this is but I know it's in there somewhere!
My situation is totally different to yours. You and your H reconciled and I don't see that ever happening in my sitch anymore. Your financial situation is the way it is b/c of the behaviours of your H whilst in MLC (and I can only applaud your level of forgiveness on this one) whilst in my situation everytime I find a way to solve financial problems my H raises his game in terms of nastiness and wanting more from me and so I never seem able to climb out of the pit he has dug for me.
We are however very similar. We would fight to the very end for our children (as costly as they are ) and neither of us is prepared to sit back and let life happen to us. You are much better at that than I as I still have very major pity parties but some of us are slow learners
So just keep on being BND as that is all that is needed for you to continue your success.
((((((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))))
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15