They are the kids' grandparents. They help with sitting if I need it.
MIL and I are friends.
None of the people we know in real life see an issue with it, or see it as unhealthy (except perhaps X). That includes others in the family, friends, our pastor... My IC has mentioned that I might not want to be the one who takes care of them in their old age, but that we have time for that, as long as I have boundaries in place.
You mention financial...maybe that is another issue. It is an "in-law" apt that they have. If I were to rent it out to anyone else, it would be an illegal apt. I'd have to deal with unknown people and whatever issues they bring, living so close to my home and kids, sharing my yard. The apt wouldn't be bringing any money in if it wasn't occupied, which can happen, and I count on that income.
So, it is what it is for now. And it really isn't bad...at this point, I realize that we will get along much better if we keep things between us, and not get involved in their relationships with any of their kids. If my x-SILs and BIL want to visit, call, etc., they know where I am. Again, it comes down to boundaries.
