As for what we would be doing on a warm beach, it's an easy answer as we have been there. Last year we went to Mexico, and 2 yrs before that we were in Jamaica. He was in bed early every night while I stayed out with family and friends in Jamaica. There was no ML...... lol That would have been a miracle. When we went to Mexico, we went with the kids and we split up. Then the idea of ML wouldn't even be able to come up. I stayed with my daughter, and he stayed with my son. Again, he was in bed very early. Me and the kids enjoyed the night life, and whatever we wanted to do. We all had a blast, but like I said in my letter, he is a roommate.
I have decided for now, I'm NOT sending anything to him. I'm not asking for a reply, or why he got pissed as he so put it. He doesn't deserve me any longer. So, I will stay in this marriage for now as it exists. He can live in his bubble, and maybe he'll come to me and say something, and maybe he won't. All I know is that it's no longer me at this point who is going to push for answers. I have talked and sent letters etc......... as much as I feel was needed. Probably too much. If we wants more, he'll have to come to me. I know he won't, but then one day when I am gone............ he can not ask why. He will know. If he doesn't, then I feel sorry for him because he will never have a true connections with anyone.
That's where I am at today. Maybe tomorrow will be different, but thats where it stands. I hadn't sent a reply to his " Im pissed " comment, and asked myself why. I came up with that Im done. I deserve more then this. I am worth some kind of effort. I should not have to chase anyone to care for me. So, I am not sending anything.
He would be so mad to know that I feel this way. He's always been the man who said >> I work hard, you should know I love you. He has always thought that because he works away this is his way of showing love. It why in the past he's been so confused as to why I was asking how he felt about me. he figured I should know all these things because he works away. So sad........
