Here Again

[xalelle]

Good things I did today:
Reminded W I needed the info on the possible date thing so I could make reservations. When I realized it was at a time that she has said she may spend a few days away with GF (I know this for sure, actually long time possible plan that I suggested so nothing scary there) I was tempted to ask her if she was sure she would be here. Didn't do that! Would have just opened the door for the wrong discussion. Made the reservation. Will mention it in a few days, not to be pushy.

Called just to say hi (cause she says she likes that) got her vm. Resisted the urge to text "you not talking to me?". Just followed the as-if rule.

She im'd me with minor complaint, not replying to my replies.. again resisting pushing. if she wants to talk to me I am here, and she knows it.

I am going to surprise her by coming home at a decent hour. I realize I may just get slapped with her going out with a friend or not wanting to be close, so I am going to not push, not say I came home for any particular reason like working on R or being with her, just that I was able to. To resist temptation leaving all work at work. Maby it will be a good surprise, maby not. either way I should get home sooner anyway.

So much of this should have been second nature. Why did I need yet another brick dropped on my head to remember how much my W means to me and why I should pay attention to her! ugh.