beno, I feel for you man. You are struggling with the same thoughts, feelings and ideas that I do on a regular basis. I know your heart aches to have her back.
I am feeling much stronger today than I did this past weekend. My take on the advice that we have received on this forum will be that you should be there for her in a strong way. Don't be rude, mean or spiteful. Listen to what she has to say, acknowledge her and focus on permanently making changes in your life to make you feel complete with or without her. This type of focusing on improving your life is NOT what got you in this postion. On the otherhand, you don't want to reinforce (buy furniture, help financially, etc...) that it is better and more fun to live a life away from you. I know that you understand her reasoning leaving, but at the end of the day you are married and it is not ok to move out like this with no plans to focus and improve the marriage. This form of separation is not healthy for any marriage. This is what I have to keep reminding myself of.
Be cautious and don't lay all of your cards face up right now. There are some positive signs for you right now and that is great. Also protect yourself, you can't focus on improving yourself while you are riding the highs and lows of this separation.
I hope you understand what I am trying to say. I just don't want you to go all in when she is the one with the Aces right now.
Good luck bud!
M 30 WAW 29 T 15 M 5 ILYBNILWY 3/8/09 Separated 3/14/09
