It's all ablazin'....

[blindsided1]

I'm back. I'll try to catch everyone up....so the judge ordered 80/20 custody to my H. He has K every other weekend. This past weekend was our normal visitation, next Friday will be her first overnight with him. I told him that we need to sit down and talk about some rules so that we are all comfortable and on the same page. And, also talk about holiday's and stuff before I draw up the order.He agreed. He's supposed to come by this week so we can do this. But, he has to check the schedule first to see if he has to do something with "the boys". Glad to see how K is a priority. So, he drops her off last night. He had her for Easter at OW's parent's house. I hate it because those people are NOT her family. She has a huge family that missed her desperately. But, we did have our time in the morning for a little while. He drops her off & the car seat is front facing. I have asked him half a dozen times to turn it rear facing until she is 22lbs & 1 year. He will not do it. I finally asked him why and he said that she likes it that way. I told him that I would rather her be safe and to turn it rear facing or I would call the police and have them ticket him. Isn't her safety supposed to be important here? Not being in control. But, he has huge control issues. I asked him where K was sleeping. He told me her crib was in "the boys'" room. I was livid. I told him she was not to sleep with two strange boys. He asked if I was worried they would molest her. WTF???? #1-it is totally inappropriate #2-they are not her family #3- she should have her own space. Why does he think that is appropriate? Then I told him I didn't want OW to discipline her. That if there was a problem, OW could go to H and he could deal with it. I'll F her up if she lays a hand on my D. Then I told him that there is to be no physical discipline. He said "It'll depend on what she does." What????? She's 9 months old. Is he a moron??? I am soooo unhappy about this situation. I cry everyday that she is going to be there. Without me!!! She has always been with me, never without me at night. What happens when she wakes up in the middle of the night and I'm not there? I know that it is an adjustment. But, I hate that this is happening to US because HE decided to leave his W and family and start another one somewhere else. She is a baby why are they allowing this at such an early age? I'm totally unhappy. I asked him if he would consider doing 1 weekend night per week for the first two months. He said he'd think about it. That would be the best way for all of us to adjust and get comfortable and make sure it's working out okay. When OW goes back to work on the 1st, he will be alone with two infants. The man can't take care of himself. How is he going to manage two infants on his own. OW won't be there. She works graveyard shift Fri-Mon.