New to the world of adultery

[FitChik]

Fit - He doesn't have to make you accept the divorce - if he wants to divorce he just have to file it - that's it.
The whole drama he came up with has no reason to be.. unless.... it is true.
If he has a close friend you know - talk to him/her - he may be more "stable" than your H and give you some insight.
I think everyone should fight for their marriage, this is why I am here, but sometimes I think it is better to back off from a situation that can be very damaging.
You are a young and obviously good person, you deserve MUCH more than this. This is not a situation were after few years of marriage things start to be complicated and you need a rescue plan to save the family. Your marriage didn't really start yet, and you are already in a lot of trouble.
I think your H is a very troubled person and you should free yourself from him.
Too many people speak about what God wants... the truth is only God knows.... but of one thing I am totally positive - He doesn't want you to be miserable.
Said that - this is what I think reading your posts - the actual situation may be very different - I can't really know - but to me it doesn't seem that with this man you have the foundations to start a family.
(((hugs)))
rop

Funny thing, our mutual friend asked if H was making all this up to push me away. My H is used to being very independent and not having love - so having someone stay by his side through thick & thin is new for him and he doesn't like it.

My H is very troubled and I hope he figures himself out one day and get his life on track. He has so many hopes & dreams but will never be able to live them out if he goes through life this way. I know I have to stand back & let him go but it hurts. I know there is nothing I can do to help him.

Thank you for your words and perspective.