HELP! Is ML to try to reconnect a mistake?

[brandnewday]

This is an example of one of the emails he sent me.......

What infuriates me is your self-righteousness in your messages and in your responses when it comes to your behavior. You still have not grasped what you did to me and others . You have no idea how much [censored] you made me eat. You get a little whiff of discomfort and you say I am being abusive. How do you think you would stand up to your own brand of abuse? I have not yelled at you. At best I have been trying to talk over your rantings. I am on a laser site focus about what I want. You are wither going to work with me or against me. There is no middle ground. There doesn't have to be an ugly confrontation when it comes to the divorce. You don't have to threaten me with the elements of law and what I should pay and how much you could take and paying for everything. I AM GONNA BE LIVING IN A SLUM AND YOU GET TO LIVE IN A HOUSE WITH MY CHILDREN. Don't be so smug. You treated me like [censored] for 20 years and you get a house. Life is fair isn't it? All I want is peace and to be legally free of your madness. I want to be left alone. Don't you get it. EVERYTIME I try and play fair and nice and patient with you, you have to bite back. You have to act uncivil and THEN CALL ME RUDE! You are infuriating. You truly don't see how you behave. You don't need to solicit advocates for yourself. GXXX HXXXX is not a pastor. This isn't Chatsworth. (I know how you work.) You get a form. We agree to the terms. We get a paralegal to notarize it and submit it to the courts. THAT'S IT. No one gives a [censored] about marriage counselling. You are grasping at desperate straws. LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY... I don't want to be married to you. I will parent with you, but I don't want to be married to you for one more day than is necessary. I am sick of your threats and your lies and your manipulations and your delays and your irrationalities. Even when you say you need to shut up and be still, you still don't do it. Today was a great example of how terrible you are at submittig yourself with humility to the one you offended. (If you happen to be a Christian this week, this is considered actions in keeping with repentance.) That's why I call you arrogant. You have a dramatic "I'm sorry" and you think your penance is paid. Yo have no respect for me. YOU HAVE NEVER LOVED ME. This only continues to prove my point. You treated me with utter disrespect after I spoke to you calmly and repectfully. THEN you had to accuse me of trying to do something under-handed. YOU ARE PARANOID. Don't you see it? Even when you get your way, you still are choosing to make my life a living hell. Thanks for your love again.

In answer to your question....

STOP trying to explain yourself to him
STOP trying to defend yourself to him.

Keeps things simple.

Validate what he says.

And using certain expressions like "I am sorry you feel this way".

When they are MLC-maniacs there isn't much point in trying to rationalize something with them.

It is like looking for logic in an illogical situation.

Someone has to change the steps to the dance you have both been doing.......