The adventure continues--part 2

[AFWAW]

Lucky,
I hope you're right and I get lucky. The man in me wants to jump her but I don't want her to turn tail and run again. I will do my best not to read into it but it is very, very, very difficult at this point!

[dburt]

I'm with Lucky, it sounds like she is looking to get a little something something. But let her snuggle up to you, make the first move, be there to be welcoming and safe if she does, otherwise, just be the best date you can be, fun to be with, and wearing whatever it was that made you smell good to her would not hurt either.

Burt

[AFWAW]

Burt,
I hope you're right. Actually a little nervous now since you guys have mentioned this. I really just want her to have a good time and see what she's missing. Hopefully she will see it and get her butt home! PLEASE!!!!!

[AFWAW]

Well, I had a good date. I didn't get lucky as everyone thought but I did get to second base. When I was kissing her, I guess it wasn't hard enough as she told me to kiss her harder! Ok, yes ma'am. She told me not to get too excited as it was that time of the month though. We had a nice dinner while watching a movie w/ my daughter. The wife fell asleep on the couch afterward and I had to wake her up so she could go home and take my daughter with her for a sleepover. Looooonnnnnnnggg hug and kiss goodbye though. Ahhhhhhh, know if she will just get out of her funk and come home so it will be permanent! So, all in all, I think she misses me, really and I hope that she is not so far gone that she doesn't want to come home. We'll see...

[FitChik]

:-) Glad to hear your date went well!

[SmileysPerson]

Slow down keemosabe. You go on a date with a girl and get a thrill. Doesn't mean you're going to write AF + WAW = TLF all over your spiral notebook and dedicate a shrine to her in your gym locker. Just means you're going to avoid her father around town for a couple days....

In other words, you made some good progress. You had a good experience. Leave it there.

FWIW, my DB Coach specifically instructed me to back WAY off the next couple days after an event like this, especially if it was as successful as yours was (mine wasn't). WAWs will feel like they're losing control and that those all-important walls are breached if you press too hard the next day. Initiate nothing, make no further invitations. Let her process in peace and mystery.

[AFWAW]

FWIW, my DB Coach specifically instructed me to back WAY off the next couple days after an event like this, especially if it was as successful as yours was (mine wasn't). WAWs will feel like they're losing control and that those all-important walls are breached if you press too hard the next day. Initiate nothing, make no further invitations. Let her process in peace and mystery.

That sounds pretty good. I won't initiate anything then but I will be available for phone calls if she wants to talk. We'll see, so far looking more promising. She's not saying I want a divorce anymore.

[AFWAW]

Wow, the wife called a bit ago. She said my daughter was snooping at her place and found mens body wash. She said, I had bought it for you when I had invited you over before. I said, when did you invite me over? She said she had, but I don't remember. Anyway, she said she had a great time last night and that she missed me and so on. She said she was floored when she saw me in the gym yesterday, that I was a sight for sore eyes. I told her it was really good to see her as well. She said she missed me and missed being home. I said, well, why don't you come home then? She said, I'm leaning that way.(Fantastic!) She said you've been fantastic about this whole thing.

She said the being by herself has been ok but it wasn't what she thought it would be. She said she knows she made a big deal about the friends thing but has only been out twice with friends and only had her girl friend over twice. She said it's lonely at night. I told her I knew how she felt. She said the only good thing has been the ability to come and go as she pleases. I didn't say anything other than, you know, if we can put the past behind us and just concentrate on the future, I'm sure it would be wonderful. She said, I know, I'm just not sure yet. So, I backed off again.

She started talking about some Korean restuarant and I told her I had been and it was good but there was a better one. She said how do you know? I said because I've been--I guess she thought I had just been sitting around moping? I said, yeah, you want to go there next for lunch one day? She said sounds good.


OK, this seems like it is progressing in the right direction. So, how do I keep it rolling that way? I'm looking for any and all inputs. Thank you so much!

[dburt]

Sounds great! Second base, not too shabby for a new first date. I do not want to give any advice in this area, but it sounds like she is close. And remember, when you get her home, this whole thing does not stop. Keep doing things to improve you, and understand what happened the first time.

My wife and I are stronger now then I think we ever have been, and it has only been a couple of months, but I still, make changes for the better, and I search for imperfections in myself and in my life that I can correct.

burt

[AFWAW]

Ugh, the wife dropped my daughter off and barely stayed 3 minutes. It's like she couldn't wait to get out of here. Then we thought the dog ran away and my daughter started crying. We found the dog and I called my wife to tell her that my daughter was upset. She was eating out somewhere. I don't know who with or if it was by herself but that kind of upset me because I offered her dinner before she left. Oh, these damn emotions are kicking in again. So, so sad. I really wish she'd make up her mind either way. She did hug and kiss me several times before she left. That probably doesn't help. Oh, why does this have to be like this? I'm starting to read into stuff again, struggling to stay detached.