A new thread, a new outlook.....

[PositivelyMommy]

Of course you want your W back. What you are doing now is learning to be a better man for yourself and also for all your relationships, for Weeman, for your family and friends and for your W. It's how I like to think of it. I don't go to church regularly but I believe in God and a higher purpose. I believe that He is giving us a chance to examine ourselves and to be a better person, otherwise, we would get complacent. I really believe that this experience will make you a better person, no matter what the outcome. How do we learn forgiveness and patience if there is nothing to forgive, if our lives were smooth sailing? How do we look at our weaknesses and our temptations if we were not put to the test to face our true self? Those are the questions I wrestle with everyday and I ask myself who is my H? What is his true self? Did I know him at all? Or is he just behaving abnormally now? I can't be sure anymore, everything seems to have jumbled together. So the only thing I can do is to examine myself and be true to myself. What kind of woman am I? I am not one for revenge or hateful thoughts. They sit very uncomfortably with me but nor am I one to stand and watch as someone else steals my H's heart away. So what do I do? I have worked to better myself. If he cannot see the 'me' who is so good, so loving, so devoted then he is a fool. So do I keep loving a fool? If I do then I am a fool. Am I OK with that? I don't see myself as a fool so no I don't feel comfortable with that and that is why I am thinking of taking a new direction. You are not there yet. Your W doesn't have a OP, she has not introduced a new OP to her family. Her family has not accepted the OP. I am in a different stage. I hope you can truncate your W's confusion or have the patience to wait it out.