Thank you all for your advice.

I realize that I've been doing all the wrong things all this time, and I wish I'd started DB back when this all started. I don't know if DB will help our M now, since so much damage has been done, but either way, it would help me...


I've made no contact with H. I'm just reading and learning...

M51, H49, D21
M 23yrs, T 28yrs
3/07 - OW Bomb
6/07 - move to MIL's; OW relocate
10/07 - OW2 Bomb
5/08 - secretly move to OW2's
end/08 - secretly get beach apt w/OW2
2/09 I petition Legal Sep, not served yet