glam, I am so happy that your C session went so well. Hang in there, my friend! You'll be fine. It's like the C and others said - your H is depressed and due to the depression, he doesn't have any energy to care about anything else, not even himself. I know how it's like because I have been there myself years ago which included wanting to just die. It can be that bad.
I am happy for you that you and H had a good C session. I hope for you that your H will come on all the days he promised to. Your Easter should be a good one if he keeps his word.
Laurie, Divorce Busting Coach Contact The Divorce Busting Center at 303-444-7004 or 800-664-2435 if you would like to schedule a telephone consultation with a DB Coach - or email virginia@divorcebusting.com for info.
Laurie do you only do telphone coaching? My husband divorced me really quick and I am still trying to figure out what happened. He now tells me that after 4 months he is getting married again to a young girl 26. He is 41! Can you give me some advice?
Dear Laurie, Nice to hear from you. If you click on my signature, it'll take you to my current thread. I haven't been posting much though. Latest update: H explicitly brought up divorce 3 weeks ago. Told him that I need time to process what he said.
Well too good to be true! H texted late in the day, just woke up won't be there today. Now I specifically asked for his help, since my work load is growing and I need to stay later at work to finish it all.
I called him and specifically asked him to honor his committments and to pull his weight while I have to put in more hours at work. He did not answer, but I left a message.
I spoke to s20 today, says my xh has been asking him if he could borrow some money. I am sure this is why he is contacting me too, well he will get a mouth full if he asks me. Oh well, he didn't pay a dime for child support and now wants to borrow money. He can go ..... !
When is this all going to stop?
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
Well too good to be true! H texted late in the day, just woke up won't be there today. Now I specifically asked for his help, since my work load is growing and I need to stay later at work to finish it all.
I called him and specifically asked him to honor his committments and to pull his weight while I have to put in more hours at work. He did not answer, but I left a message.
I spoke to s20 today, says my xh has been asking him if he could borrow some money. I am sure this is why he is contacting me too, well he will get a mouth full if he asks me. Oh well, he didn't pay a dime for child support and now wants to borrow money. He can go ..... !
When is this all going to stop?
Glam, it won't stop becuase they don't want to stop it. If it were me in your place, I wouldn't put up with any of it. I realize that you aren't me, so if you are going to be in the mess, you need to put some distance between you and the mess so you don't completely lose your mind.
Glam, YOu are expecting something from a person who can't get it together. I hate to say this, but you will have to find an alternative, i.e., help, rather than rely on him. He's not capable of being there for you or your children. The more you are expecting him to be there or do something for you, the more aggravated, disappointed and angry you will be.
As for your xh....I knew he wanted something. I know that you are a smart lady and so is your son....this man wasn't there for either of you when he needed to be...please do not get sucked up into his drama. You will need to set boundaries w/him as well.
As for your current situation...distance yourself....learn to rely on others (I know that this is extremely hard for you), but you will need to so in order to keep your sanity.
Please try to have a pleasant Easter.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
6am cell phone rings and it's h. Says he wanted to be the first one to wish me a happy birthday. That was a pleasant suprise.
My guess is that he stayed up all night. He says he is going to sleep and then be over after lunch. No expectations here. He wanted to take the kids and do something to celebrate my birthday. Now I am not much into celebrating my birth. It's just another year older, but I am blessed to have a fairly good life.
I will return xh's call, but will not help him nor get sucked into his problems. I hear he is living with some girl who has no job. Let her go out and work. I am livid that my xh would ask s20 and me for money!
I am taking d5 out for a pedicure today. That should be fun! Working on alternative childcare. Not sure about my work schedule. They are creating new ones. I have had this same schedule for a year and a half. Oh well will cross that bridge when I need to.
Happy Easter!
Me 50 H 42 S 22 S 9 D 7 M 12 T 17 H moved out 8/2006 H moved home 1/2007 for 3 weeks H moved home 5/2011 for good
"Learn from yesterday ~ Live for today ~ And hope for tomorrow"
