WAW/Affair Confirmed - Advice? #2

[DCBHM]

Since she had D1 with her I text-messaged her the following:

I can't stop you from having an affair, but have more respect for our daughter's health. You should not put her in your drama. Good mothers don't do that.

Very likely she'll view that as a way to push my buttons and do it even more. Insomnia is back ever since I backed off the legal preparations. My case is pretty much done, so I have had to start feeling things again.

I've fought the urge to set boundaries such as requiring her not to park at OM's house prior to picking up D1, but that wouldn't make me look good anyway, and just makes her look worse by what she is doing.

She goes from childlike victim to vindictive b***h back and forth, although she is more passive-aggressive at this point than straight-up aggressive like she was in the beginning.

I told my preacher/therapist that I'm moving on... haven't told W though. Figured she would get it eventually since actions speak louder than words. Maybe she viewed my compassion/reaching out as passivity? Maybe (likely) she wants a pursuit because she craves the drama and attention. OM is just a means to break me down emotionally so that she can control our relationship. D1 is just a tool for her to use for that same control. She is manipulative, and tries to keep me reliant on her for everything. The more I pull away, the more blatant the A gets.

Not understanding.