Quote: After H read 5LL he finally clicked that my LL is quality time so now we go out one night a week to a salsa class. I swear it is the only thing keeping our marriage together. If it weren't for that one night out together I think I would be throwing in the towel by now. Maybe it would be a good thing to schedule something where you don't have to talk face to face, like dancing or bowling or something. Maybe your H is fighting shy because he thinks it will end up being R talks all the time?
hey haphazard,
I think I'd be happy if h just read or pretended to read the 5ll's or any of the other many books I've got lying around the house that I've mentioned to him.
I think I'd drop dead of shock if h agreed to take a dance class or anything like that with me.
Quote: The time you mentioned when he asked you to watch football on TV with him and you turned him down. Maybe that was a babystep? Not ideally what you would like - a crumb as you put it - but maybe you have to build the cake one crumb at a time?
tired of taking crumbs hoping they'll lead somewhere only to realize that crumbs is all I'll get. plus truth be told..though there was a time when I would watch football with him, after c's suggesting perhaps since football is one of his main interests he could share that with me and take me to some games h's response was "that's just the guys" so F him when it comes to football..perhaps if he said...wanna play a game of cards and watch the game (most people can multi task can't they...I mean after all he can sit and talk on the phone with buddie while watching the game) but anyway.
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BTW on the question of loneliness and being stuck with the kids - I hear you, although I do have a couple of girlfriends in same sitch and we get together. You mention you're gf's are busy with chores etc. Can this work: I alternate one morning a week minding my friend's kids for her and vice versa then we have lunch together. I also alternate dropping off and picking up S to pre-school with another friend and then we usually at least have a cup of tea or something when we drop the other child back. It works because we are helping each other out as well as just getting together to chat.
that sounds nice...and in theory I do have a friend in town to do that with and we've talked about it..despite the fact that our sons go to different pre schools we still could get together with the littler ones while they are at school but it never seems to pan out...even when we try to make the plans to do so...one of her kids always seems to get sick or her h needs something.
maybe things will be better for me when both of my kids are in school all day.
