All because you have let go of any power you have, you have allowed this to be her decision and not yours and she will do whatever she wants to do now because you are letting her.
robx could you ellaborate on this please? thank you just one more thing i would like to also ask is ive heard so many people say if you show your wife you are looking for someone new they will divorce you in an instance and that will ruin any good work you have put in to try and rebuild.
i also want to share this, when she left she took a few clothes, the for 2 weeks she kept phoning and texting for all her personal things.. so i plucked up the courage and packed all her stuff and dropped them off, it tore me into. but guess what she managed to blame me for that by telling her sister that i got over the break up really fast beacuse all her stuff was there when she arrived home from work... how the hell can that be?
she has also said to me today she might be going with the girls for a weekend away for her birthday on 25 may, and can i take her passport up to her. and she said i told my mum and said would it be cheeky asking me to pay for her as a present, SHE HAS SOME FACE THAT WOMAN, guess what no i wont be paying, period........
cheers guys i will post later so much more to say
Do you start to see the pattern that is emerging? You do what she asks but you get in trouble for it. Everything you do from now on because you are acting much less than man should act like is making her see that you are pathetic & weak. This needs to change right now.
What didn't you understand about letting go of your power as a man and letting her make this decision?
The both of you entered the previous relationship model (marriage, kids, committment) by mutual consent: you didn't force her, she didn't force you - you did it together because you loved each other and wanted to spend your lives together.
She now has created a new relationship model: she is leaving you, separating (remember separation is like cancer to a marriage, it is a definite prelude to divorce) from you, wanting her own place (why does she want her own place? is it to be away from you & "find herself" or is it to be with other men and have sexual relationships and pursue the new feelings of excitement & infatuation, not love). She created this relationship model on her own and didn't ask your consent.
The relationship model she has created doesn't want to eliminate you entirely. You are the security blanket, the given, the status quo, you won't change. She knows you love her, she knows your devoted, and she knows you will stay where you are hoping that she'll come back to you and love you again. You see if she really wanted to leave you & your marriage, she would have filed for separation or divorce immediately.
But she wants her exciting new life & new affair(s) but if they don't work out, it's nice to know she has something to fall back on if she ever decides that her fantasy life isn't all that it was cracked up to be.
Do you see it? I hope I'm explaining this clearly enough.
