What you have to start to wrap your head around is that there are ways to be a man, and to "fight for" your marriage without fighting WITH, your wife, nor appeasing her either.
There are ways to fight and not pursue.
I was given a very simple rule to follow, by another poster on these very boards, and it served me well:
Rather than worrying about how my wife would react to something, and how her reaction would make ME feel (my normal nature -- very enmeshed and co-dependent, and a big conflict-avoider), I instead asked myself:
"What is the RIGHT THING TO DO in this situation? What would God Himself have me do, if He were standing right in front of me?"
And then I'd do that. And if I found that I didn't have the COURAGE to do that, I prayed for the courage. And if I didn't have the PATIENCE,, or the LOVE to do it, I prayed for that.
And I prayed for wisdom and discernment every morning, and for God to send people across my path to help me do the right thing.
And I was amazed that He always did.
You can do this.
Puppy
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
