It's a "neither" thing. It just shouldn't have much impact on your strategy one way or another. Many newbies make the mistake of latching on to what they think are "baby steps" (many of us hate that term to begin with -- blccch!), and are, in actuality, nothing but puffs of simple GUILT, or -- worse -- the wayward spouse is in a good mood because they just got their OM/OW fix (in affair situations, "GOOD = BAD" and "BAD = GOOD" when it comes to their moods).
I do think it can be a good thing if a spouse is nice to you following some sort of boundary enforcement or exposure on your part, as it can mean a sign of newfound respect (and women closely tie respect with love), but other than that, you simply shouldn't put too much weight on it one way or another.
